Yesterday. Yes. Yesterday I got hurt, unconsciously. And all the pain showed up today. He made me fall for him. I never asked him to be my friend nor to be close to me. But he did. He was sweet, caring, and everything ideal. And most of all, he understood me. I falled for him because he showed me these things. He showed me sweetness no man would ever do. He was perfect. I thought I was the only special he had.
There she was, the girl he loved. The girl he made special. The girl in his heart. I guess I got struck with my friend's question about why our hearts feel pain when we are broken-hearted when our emotions are controlled by our hypothalamus. I could never answer directly. Because although I know why, I would never agree. Because I feel hurt in my heart. I felt deep pain in my chest. No matter how I knock it out, it would never go away. The pain stays. The pain lingers. But I never cried. Because I didn't invest in anything. I just hallucinated, that's why I got hurt. That's why it made me all distracted. I know i'll move on soon. Maybe a day or 2. But never would I forget the feeling of being special, of being understood but being fooled by his actions. I was wrong again and again. Why did I even Hoped in the first place? he showed me such stimulus I could not resist. He showed me things I could never find in anybody. He is special. I am not for him.
Make me move on fast. I need not to be distracted. I have responsibilities. Pain is part of Life. THIS I must accept.
T_T
There she was, the girl he loved. The girl he made special. The girl in his heart. I guess I got struck with my friend's question about why our hearts feel pain when we are broken-hearted when our emotions are controlled by our hypothalamus. I could never answer directly. Because although I know why, I would never agree. Because I feel hurt in my heart. I felt deep pain in my chest. No matter how I knock it out, it would never go away. The pain stays. The pain lingers. But I never cried. Because I didn't invest in anything. I just hallucinated, that's why I got hurt. That's why it made me all distracted. I know i'll move on soon. Maybe a day or 2. But never would I forget the feeling of being special, of being understood but being fooled by his actions. I was wrong again and again. Why did I even Hoped in the first place? he showed me such stimulus I could not resist. He showed me things I could never find in anybody. He is special. I am not for him.
Make me move on fast. I need not to be distracted. I have responsibilities. Pain is part of Life. THIS I must accept.
T_T
No comments:
Post a Comment